Why couples who gossip feel closer and happier

Is gossip toxic? A new study published by the University of California, Riverside (USA) suggests something positive rather than superficial. According to experts, couples who share gossip (talking about what someone said or commenting on someone's unusual outfit) actually make them feel more connected, happier, and more satisfied in their relationship.

The researchers defined gossip as “any conversation about someone who is not present,” which ranges from neutral or positive comments (“Did you notice how handsome Braulio looked yesterday?”) to more snide remarks (“I think Claudia can’t stand her boss one more minute”).

It's not so much the content that matters, but the context : when gossip happens within a couple, it can act as a form of emotional synchronization, a secret language that reinforces the complicity and connection between the two people. "Whether we admit it or not, we all do it. And when we do it with our partners, it has a powerful impact on the relationship," explains Chandler Spahr, lead author of the study published in the Journal of Science and Personal Relationships .

To reach these conclusions, the researchers conducted a curious experiment involving 76 couples of different genders in Southern California. Each participant wore a small device called an EAR ( Electronically Activated Recorder ), which recorded random snippets of their conversations throughout the day; typically 14% of their daily conversations.

The results were revealing: on average, couples spent 38 minutes a day gossiping . Of that total, 29 minutes were shared with their partners. Interestingly, all-female couples (female-female) were the ones who gossiped the most and also reported feeling happier with their partners and experiencing higher relationship quality. Furthermore, the amount of gossip shared was significantly correlated with higher levels of happiness. In other words, the more gossip (within a couple), the happier everyone (couple members) was.

“Negative gossip with a partner after returning from a party might indicate that the bond between the two is stronger than with their friends, while positive gossip might prolong the fun,” the study authors wrote. “It might reinforce the perception that couples are on the same team, which increases feelings of connection, trust, and other positive qualities of the relationship, as well as contributing to overall well-being.” But of course, not all gossip is helpful. According to experts, it’s not about slander, cruelty, or unsympathetic judgment, but rather gossip that stems from common humor or lighthearted analysis.

Is gossip toxic? A new study published by the University of California, Riverside (USA) suggests something positive rather than superficial. According to experts, couples who share gossip (talking about what someone said or commenting on someone's unusual outfit) actually make them feel more connected, happier, and more satisfied in their relationship.